Monday, 6 July 2009

A Proper Copper


Mr Bill has kindly written an update.

Well, it's been a while, I know. Sorry for the delay in blogging (again).

Well, I can't believe that I have now been in the police force for two years. Just last week, I completed my 2 year initial probationary period. I have now finished my necessary paperwork to enable me to obtain a NVQ in policing (To be honest, I am not sure how much use it will be to me if i ever left the police?). But I digress. The 2 years have flown by and I have become more and more confident in my actions and decisions. I have been assaulted at least 3 times, twice fairly seriously. However I still love the job, and often wish I joined ten years ago, but realise that I would not have been the same person 10 years ago, and it is futile to say "I wish..." (unless you are holding a shiny brass lamp with a genie inside it).

I still enjoy the call from the control room that says "Immediate response" as it means I can use the blue flashing lights and 'woo-woo' sirens :-)

However, I have begun to get to the stage where I hear a call on the radio for "any officer who can attend for a report of criminal damage" and I feel like holding back from responding, as I know that I will attend the scene of some poor individual who has woken up to find their car scratched, or their greenhouse window broken, and both the victim and myself know there is very little chance of finding the offender.

But to make a claim on insurance, the police must be informed, and when the police attend, the offence must be 'crimed'. This means issuing the victim with a crime reference number, and then seeing if there is any forensic opportunities. If there are forensic opportunities, that is brilliant and my heart lifts and there is hope. However, most of the time there is not, and after searching for elusive clues, I return to the station and 'record the crime'. I phone our crime recording bureau and relay the details of the crime and the victims details. Once this is done, I need to populate the fields of the crime report with the information that I know to date and also with details of what enquiries are yet to be completed. This crime complaint is viewed by my sergeant, an inspector and the 'monitoring unit'. The Monitoring Unit are like the police of the police. They check that I have ticked all the boxes, that I have handed out the relevant literature and that I update the victim at regular intervals. They also suggest areas that may still need to be investigated in case I have not mentioned them in my dialogue. This means that my dialogue must have every avenue explored and explained - otherwise I get some comment that says something like "Have you considered the use of the dog section" or "Has the victim advice leaflet been handed out?" All of these are relevant and I guess necessary, and without such checks, it would be all too easy to get crimes buried under the carpet and never investigated properly.

I guess I just get frustrated about how long I have to spend updating crimes with meaningless words just so they are 'compliant'. The victim already knows that there is little to no hope of solving the crime, and I think if the victim realised how much work each little crime entailed for the police, then many crime would never be reported in the 1st place.
But that is the problem - I want people to report the crimes, I want to be able to solve the crimes, I want to be able to find the bad people or careless people who have caused others to suffer financial loss, become afraid or paranoid. I just feel that the present system is so top heavy and in reality, so long as you are quick at typing and can make up the bull s**t then you can create and complete crime complaint forms quite easily.

The real problem comes when you really can't do any more investigation on the crime, and you respectfully request the powers that be that the crime be submitted as 'Undetected'. This is where it hurts. All officers want as many 'detecteds' (or - D's) as possible. And so we come back to the original call on the radio - a call to suspected criminal damage - and immediately the thought process starts - "is this another undetected just awaiting my arrival?"

OK - don't worry, I still answer the radio and I still try my best to solve every crime I am called to. In fact I am really hopeful that a recent case of criminal damage I attended may be detected...

I was called to a greenhouse that had been damaged. One pane broken. Elderly person had gone out in the morning and found the side pane of the greenhouse broken. Another hopeless crime?

Well, obviously the others thought so, as the initial response on the radio was... silence. The call came through again, and although I was busy, I stated that I would attend the address upon becoming available.

When I arrived at the address I was met by a lovely elderly couple. They took me to their back garden and showed me the damage. It was then that I spotted the beer bottle. And then another beer bottle. I donned my latex gloves and placed the bottles into my property bags. I looked out towards the back of their garden and saw some terraced houses that back onto their property. Knowing the area quite well, I spotted one particular property that I have been to on a number of occasions - Noise problems, drunken male problems, fighting etc. By my reckoning, someone from that property has been drinking and then once the contents have been consumed, the owner has decided to get rid of the empty bottle by throwing it away - over the hedge into the neighbours garden - not caring where it lands or what damage it may cause.

So hopefully the bottle will have the fingerprints or DNA of someone who is already known to the police (don't you just love the DNA and fingerprint database?). Yeah, there is a lot of ifs, maybes and possiblies. However, I want to do the best I can to see if I can find out who caused the damage - which irresponsible fool has been brainless enough to throw an empty bottle flying that could have injured or even killed another human being had the circumstances been different (what if there had been someone in the greenhouse at the time, what if the bottle had hit a child in another garden, what if...)

And so it is that I now await the results of the forensic tests - which could be a number of weeks. But I was glad it was me that attended the old couples house. They are the people I work for, they are the 'victims' they are the people that need to see the police working for them!

And so it was that same day I took a walk up to the property where I thought the bottle had been thrown from. I talked to my main suspect and I asked him if he or any of his friends may have thrown the bottles. He obviously denied it and pretended to know nothing. It is so difficult to see with some people if they really know nothing or if they just don't have a brain cell between their two ears. I think with my suspect it is both. He was most likely so drunk he didn't know he had done it. He has so many parties at his house that it could have been any number of people.
So all I can do at the moment is try to put some fear into him. Hopefully get him telling his friends that the police are doing DNA tests. All of his friends are known to the police and hopefully one of them will feel really bad for a while - not through remorse I realise that these people don't suffer from guilt trips. No, my hope is that they are afraid that they may get 'fingered' by the police and that even if the evidence is not enough to go to court, it will be enough to approach the council, and it will be one more piece of evidence that can be presented to the council to build a case against the tenant. One more nail in his tenancy coffin. One more complaint that will mean he is eventually evicted. Yes, I will talk to the local housing officer, yes I do know the officer by name and I have talked to him about this individual before, and yes, the council will take action once they have enough evidence or complaints.

So because I took that call and decided to pursue the 'no-hoper' case properly, maybe the offender will face their just deserts - maybe not this time around, but by me doing my job properly, he may be evicted sooner rather than never. That is all I can hope for at the moment.

Slowly, Slowly, catchy monkey.

Wednesday, 17 December 2008

It’s all good...

Well, as I have just realised, the end of the year is closing in fast, and as I look forwards to my first Christmas ‘on the beat’, I thought that I would look back on the year that has just passed.

Avid readers will remember that I finished my 9 months of training at Police HQ in the early part of 2008 and I attained the status of Student Officer fit for independent patrol some 10 weeks after that.
A driving course followed from that, which was the most fun I can remember having for many a year – being able to break the speed limits and get my picture taken by speed camera vans, and not have to worry.

The rest of the year has been a time of learning to police in ‘the real world’. I have been pleasantly surprised at how ‘un-phased’ I have been by most situations and have really enjoyed being out on Friday and Saturday nights – talking with the happy drunks and grappling with the angry drunks. I have grown to realise that much of Policing is how you present yourself and much of it is just listening and trying to help.

I have been assaulted three times in the last year, by a drunk, a prisoner trying to escape and also whilst out in the wilds when I needed to arrest an ex special forces soldier. Despite my run-ins and injuries sustained, I have never thought I have made the wrong decision. I have been really grateful for a strong supportive family, a wife who is tremendous (thanks, Mrs Bill) and also for the support and camaraderie from my fellow officers. I can truly say that I have felt ‘part of the family’.

What do I enjoy the most?
It’s got to be the call over the radio “Any unit available that can attend an immediate?” This is the call that could be a road traffic collision (RTC), an ongoing fight outside a pub, a domestic ongoing, or any number of other events. The hairs go up o the back of your neck, you look at your colleague and reply to the call with “India Oscar 21 – available – what is it?”. You are then relayed the facts of the incident, the address to get to and any background info that the operations room have been able to glean in the seconds that they have been receiving the 999 call.

What do I enjoy the least?
I guess it has to be the paperwork. I sometimes hear a call on the radio and whilst responding, I am thinking – how much paperwork is this one little incident going to bring about?

If it is not the paperwork, I think it is the genuine loathing that I have for those people that bring misery to normal people. I am talking about the habitual criminal that doesn’t care about the fruit of their actions. This is the sort of person who is constantly being brought into the police station and each time let go by the court. Yes, I understand people have bad childhoods, I understand people need a second chance. But I also think that joe public deserve to have a decent life and be able to leave their car outside their house without some complete moron scratching it “because it’s not fair that I don’t have one”.

Have I changed?
I was asked by a colleague whether my family had noticed a change in me over the last year and a half. Results were varied, but included:
Happier
More outgoing
Closer circle of friends
Language has deteriorated – a bit more course/vulgar
Don’t use the computer as much

What do I think has changed:
I feel more alive
I go to work looking forward to the day (or night)
I don’t know what to expect – ‘anything could happen in the next 8-10 hours’
I am knackered at the end of a shift
I love the days off
I hate the ironing of countless white shirts
I am more confident in myself
I feel older

Yes, I feel older – but I am not sure if this is the fault of the job, or maybe a gradual realisation that I am not as young as I used to be.

Anyway, enough of the self pity, just because I feel older (and look older) doesn’t mean to say that I have to act any older. I am getting down the gym, going out mountain biking and I would like to say that my beer and chocolate intake has decreased. I would like to say it, but unfortunately I can’t L

Yes, life is good, I am enjoying the job, I am enjoying life. I have seen a number of sudden deaths, some very old and some far too young. I have always thought that life is for living, but even more so now.

Hopefully I will blog again prior to Christmas, but if not – Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to all readers. I hope you make the most of it!

Monday, 17 November 2008

It's been busy........

What’s been happening?

Well, it’s a few months since my last blog and I can only apologise that I have been so tardy.
However, I have been finding that after completing 8 or 9 hour shifts where I am completing paperwork after paperwork, that I really don’t feel like sitting at the keyboard yet again when I get home.

SO what’s been happening?

Well, the easiest answer is lots!

I have started to find that the paperwork is becoming a bit easier – although I still find it overwhelmingly tiresome and repetitive. It seems like there are loads of things that are duplicated, that could be minimised with decent IT systems that would talk to each other. I have also started to think that the police are being used as typewriter monkeys for the CPS (Crown Prosecution Service) and the courts, as so many MG (manual of guidance) forms need to be completed just so a well paid lawyer can look at the case and decide just how ‘good’ they feel about the case and what the chances are that the case can be proven in court.

I have also seen people who have received quite nasty assaults and I have stated in my notes that the assault amounts to ABH (Aggravated Bodily Harm) or GBH (Grevious Bodily Harm), but instead the CPS know that they will definitely get Common Assault proven, and so downgrade the charge.

This is one of the hardest parts, as I have to go and tell the victims that the trauma they have gone through is only going to be dealt with by a far lesser offence, and many times Common Assault can be dealt with by a fine and a suspended sentence, or maybe just a fine, or sometimes just a caution.

I understand that prisons are full and I understand that there are times when a bit of leniency can help to prevent turn a ‘one-time-offender’ into a ‘persistent-offender’, but the CPS aren’t really looking at it like that. In this modern day, they too have targets and cost restraints. They have to be ‘accountable’ for their actions. If they can get 16 common assaults through the books knowing that 100% of them will be positive for them, rather than 8 out of 16 ABH assaults that are positive, then they have a 200% better track record, and less cost per crime than they would have had.
This will mean that justice is ‘seen to be done’. The public will look at the massaged reports on the news that the ‘detection’ rate for crimes is very high, and the CPS will be able to say that they have a high success rate for all crimes that they pursue, and justify their pay rises etc.

I have just read back the last paragraphs, and realise that I am coming over as a cynic. This is not the point – I feel proud about the job I am doing and I feel strongly for the rights of those that have been brave enough to come forward to the police to make a complaint against others, knowing full well that they may receive further harassment and abuse due to their actions. I also feel annoyed that I may have to fill out 16 full files, just to have 8 of them go through – downgraded to a lesser charge, just so another department can ‘look good’. The public do realise that the police are on their side, they do understand that the CPS have their hands tied to a certain extent, but the plain truth of the matter is that the offenders also know that they can ‘get away ‘ with it – which sends out completely the wrong message.

Well, I’ve started to write again, I’ve had a rant. I’ll try and put a few stories in over the coming weeks of events that have happened to me that I have found interesting, moving or funny (or even all three)........

Monday, 30 June 2008

What a Shi**y Job…

A report straight from Mr Bill

I was on duty at the big hospital in Llanffuglen, accompanied by my colleague PC PAVA Queen (so named as she has been spraying PAVA like it’s hairspray). We had been in attendance at the hospital since 0730 in the morning, keeping an eye on PLONKER. Earlier he had insisted he had swallowed a quantity of heroin and therefore could not stay in our lovely comfy cells at the police station, instead it was up to the tax payer to make funds available for PLONKER to stay in a high dependency unit, guarded by two police constables at all times.

And so it was that I was seated near the bed, and PC PAVA Queen was standing near the end of the bed. PLONKER was stood between both myself and PC PAVA Queen when without warning he threw the contents of a plastic cup of tea in my direction, which resulted in my face and front of my shirt being covered in tea. Almost simultaneously he threw the contents of a plastic cup of water over PC PAVA Queen and started to move towards her. I immediately rose to my feet and at the same time and as I did so, PLONKER was already next to PC PAVA Queen and was attempting to pass her. As he did so, PC PAVA Queen grabbed PLONKER by the upper chest area in an attempt to stop him. As PC PAVA Queen did this, I was immediately behind PLONKER. PLONKER then grabbed PC PAVA Queen’s radio with his right hand in what seemed like an attempt to take it from her. PC PAVA Queen pulled PLONKER’s hand away. I had now managed to get hold of PLONKER’s left hand, and followed this through with a knee strike to PLONKER’s left leg which had the desired effect of bringing him to the ground. As PLONKER descended to the floor, all three of us slipped, due to the amount of water and tea and slippery floor. I saw PC PAVA Queen fall backwards and as she did so, PLONKER looked as though he was reaching for her incapacitant spray. As he did this, PC PAVA QUEEN pulled PLONKER’s hand away from the canister and then held the canister and shouted “SPRAY” in a loud clear manner, allowing me to take evasive action prior to her deploying the incapacitant spray. As PC PAVA Queen released the spray, PLONKER immediately felt the effect and screamed out as the spray took effect. PLONKER was now face down and I managed to handcuff him in the back stack position. PLONKER continued to struggle with ourselves, but we managed to restrain him on the floor, and once he had calmed down to a stage where he would listen to instructions, PC PAVA Queen and myself lifted him to the seated position. However, PLONKER was continuing to shout and scream, causing surrounding patients and staff at the hospital distress.

Approximately one minute after placing PLONKER into the seated position, several colleagues arrived and helped to escort PLONKER out of the ward into the fresh air to help relieve the symptoms of the incapacitant spray. As soon as PLONKER was in a fit state to understand instructions, I told him that he was under arrest for assault on Police Officers. PLONKER then remained handcuffed for the rest of the day…

A bit later, PLONKER was moved to a private room and it was gratifying to see that he was still suffering irritation from the pepper spray that had been administered some hours earlier. Whilst in the room, PLONKER admitted to PC PAVA Queen and myself “I HAVEN’T GOT ANYTHING IN ME, I MADE IT UP TO GET OUT OF THERE” PC PAVA Queen then clarified with PLONKER what he meant by “ANYTHING” to which PLONKER replied “I DIDN’T SWALLOW ANY HEROIN IN CUSTODY, I MADE IT UP TO GET OUT OF THERE”.

PLONKER then apologised to myself and PC PAVA Queen stating the only reason he had thrown tea and water over us was due to his need to “GET SOME GEAR”.

PC PAVA Queen and myself remained in immediate proximity with PLONKER until he had evacuated his bowels with the aid of a very strong hospital laxative. The attending nurse examined the stools and waste matter and confirmed there were no illegal substances present. After this PLONKER was allowed a shot of methadone to calm the cravings he was starting to have for heroin.

All of the above took up the whole shift, and so it was at the end of the shift that we returned with PLONKER to the police station and then to the comfy cells of custody and it is there where he will stay until the court has decided what to do with him. Oh yes, and apparently the hospital laxative will continue to work on PLONKER for at least the next 12 hours – what a shame :-)

Sunday, 22 June 2008

Violence on the Streets of Llanffuglen


Friday and Saturday nights are now well known by all to be times when the good citizens of the UK go out and get merry, then get even merrier and then start to get extremely merry, and then finally get violent.

Friday and Saturday nights are now well known by all to be times when the good citizens of the UK go out and get merry, then get even merrier and then start to get extremely merry, and then finally get violent.

Well it seems that Llanffuglen is no different from the rest of the UK, and despite its picturesque outlook and rolling green pastures, Llanffuglen attracts all sorts to its town centre at the weekend. The majority of these revellers are no problem at all to the police, and in fact it is rather funny to sit inside a patrol car at various stages of the evening and gradually see people getting drunker and drunker, until by 0200hrs, the lady who was immaculately turned out at 2000hrs the night before, can now no longer remember how to walk properly and has great pleasure in trying to hail a police car in the mistaken thought that it is a taxi (I guess it is our own fault as we have those silly signs on the top of the car that look very similar).

It is also incredible how much alcohol smells on the breath. This is extremely noticeable as revellers place their head by the open drivers window of the police car and speak utter nonsense to the police officer inside. Being someone who appreciates a drink myself, it has been interesting to be completely sober and witness the events of the evening unfold, especially how violent people seem to become. Females have arguments over the silliest things, and the use of the stiletto heels that they have so painfully been enduring on their feet make marvellous weapons when used in their hands!

But blokes are the worst - official. They constantly go around in good humoured groups, pushing and shoving each other in boyish ways, and then later into the evening, the pushing becomes more forceful, but due to the lubricating effects of alcohol, it is all accepted within the group - even when the pushing becomes very forceful and then progresses to feats of strength where one of the group tries lifting the other up - often with the obvious result of both individuals falling to the floor in a crumpled heap. Yes, this is all good fun for blokes and to be honest, it is funny to look at when sitting inside a police car, listening out to the police radio in case a domestic or road traffic accident demands our attention.

However, it is once the happy and funny stunts have finished that life really gets interesting - this is normally anywhere from 2300hrs onwards and goes on until maybe 0400 or 0500hrs. This is the time that the alcohol and also the drugs have really allowed the brains of those that like to take things to excess the chance to really say and do what they really really want.

This may be as harmless as bearing their backsides to passing pedestrians and motorists, or maybe trying to 'tightrope walk' along the bridge wall that separates them from being dry and alive, to possibly being wet and dead. But possibly the worst effect is that of stimulating the human being to think that they are super-human and can take on the world - whether the world wants them to or not.

So as last night was Saturday night and Mr. Bill being on an evening shift, he and his colleagues donned their protective stab vests and all weather gear (it was a horrible rainy night at times) and patrolled the merry streets of Llanffuglen, helping to protect the community therein.

There were the usual calls in the early evening - a shoplifter at the supermarket, youths causing problems kicking cans and bins. Neighbours needing the police to talk to the other neighbour, and then calling the police back ten minutes later because "Next door has started doing it again!". Yes, this is the warm-up time when patrol cars are dispatched to sort out all the silly problems that can't normally be rectified for a permanent resolution, merely sticking plasters that will help stop the wound from hurting for a while longer.

But last night seemed to go very quickly and it was soon 0300 hours. Mr Bill was sitting near a local night club, wondering how the girls didn't catch a cold as they were wearing so little, and also wondering just how far we are ahead of the apes in our evolutionary progress as he saw groups of males trying to climb lampposts, bearing their chests to each other and generally staggering home on autopilot.

However, he was approached by a female stating that there was a male nearby who had assaulted her last month and that the police were looking for him. After checking with the operations room that the female was telling the truth and that the police were looking for this male (I really could not call him a man or a gentleman after knowing what he has done), Mr. Bill approached the male to inform him that he was arresting him for the assault on the female last month and that the male should come along with Mr. Bill quietly and immediately. The male seemed to take offence at the sight of Mr. Bill (maybe it's the tie I was wearing or it could have been the cologne), and so the male made it quite clear to Mr. Bill in words that would offend most decent-minded folks that the male did not want to accompany Mr. Bill, and that Mr. Bill was free to go and do several things, none of which could be printed on this page.

And so it was that Mr. Bill laid his hand on the male and told him that he was under arrest. Fortunately Mr. Bill’s colleagues had also turned up and another police officer held the male’s other hand. Cutting a long story short, the male was very uncooperative and showed this by placing his head very hard and very forcibly into Mr. Bill's head, causing quite a bit of pain to Mr. Bill. (in civvie parlance: he headbutted him, Mrs Bill)

This really was a very silly thing to do, as the male now had added to his list of crimes 'Police Assault'. The male was swiftly brought to the ground as Mr. Bill lifted the male’s leg forwards and Mr. Bill’s colleagues assisted gravity to bring the male to the ground where he was then restrained by the use of handcuffs.

However, this was not before PAVA (pepper) spray had been deployed by a colleague of Mr. Bill. As PAVA is not particularly discriminate in focusing its attention only on naughty people, several police including Mr. Bill also found out what it is like to be sprayed with PAVA.

I can state for the record that it is not a pleasant experience, but at least the next time a low-life asks me "Have you ever tried that stuff out on yourself?", I can honestly say "Yes".

After the incident, the male was taken to police custody, and upon searching the male, a small quantity of white powder was found in his jeans - allowing yet another charge to be levelled at the male - "Illegal possession of a controlled substance".

The male did not seem to find it nearly as funny as Mr. Bill as the cell door slammed shut. Just to make sure the male was ok, Mr. Bill did open the flap of the door and ask the male if there was anything else he could do for him. Surprisingly, or maybe not so surprisingly, the male uttered words that yet again cannot be published on a website where decent folk may be browsing.

Mr. Bill closed the flap shut and then went to A&E to get his head and hand looked at.

All was ok with Mr. Bill’s head, it would seem that although the collision of the male’s head against Mr. Bill's was heard by all at the scene, with several people wincing at the sound, Mr. Bill will live to 'fight', or maybe that should be 'serve' another day.

(Mr Bill’s head has a small bump – but no bruising apparent at present. He does have a cut on his finger and some minor scrapes to his arm. His eyes continued to sting for some time and still appear a little red. (Mrs Bill))

Saturday, 21 June 2008

Feel the Force

Well apologies from Mrs Bill for whom the study of Shakespeare and assorted poets has been very time-consuming of recent weeks. ‘Poet’ is quite an elastic term to describe some of the literary outpourings to which Mrs Bill has subjected the reluctant ears of the little Bills to on the way to school of a morning.

Fortunately Mr Bill has not allowed any of this to deter him from his mission of removing the miscreants who endeavour to make the lives of ordinary law-abiding people less pleasant and often considerably more dangerous. Several of them have ‘Felt The Force’ of Mr Bill’s wrath in recent weeks and at least one is having a sojourn at her Majesty’s pleasure until such time as he appears before a Court. Mr Bill has been very busy making up a ‘full file’ in the meantime. While the rest of us ordinary mortals thought that the police arrested the criminals and it was the job of the lawyers to make the case it turns out that these highly skilled individuals are paid far too much money to worry about trivial things like compiling a case from evidence supplied by the police. The Bill clan are watching with interest to see at what stage the legal eagles actually do some work.

Mr Bill has been making extensive use of the driving skills he learned on his course and has managed to shave several minutes off previous best times for some journeys. He needs to make sure he retains all the skills as he is hoping to attend the advanced driving course at some point in the future. Just don’t ask him how long it takes to drive anywhere as it is so much quicker when you are in a police car with blue lights and siren going!

Mr Bill has been so good as to supply me with a selection of photos of aspects of his work to be included as illustration in the blog. To begin here is a picture of his current mentor.
(He does not usually look so rough, but this was taken after a particularly hard shift)

Sunday, 18 May 2008

Watch Out…

Well, three weeks of driving later and Mr. Bill had his driving assessment. He passed with flying colours and attained a good enough grade to allow him to apply for an advanced driving course at a later stage.

This means that if he decides to go into the traffic division he now has the first building block in place.

The next stage is to get out on the streets and start catching the bad guys.

He has been told that the best way to get the top brass to notice you, is to get lots of tickets in.. This means stopping dodgy looking vehicles and drivers and asking them to present their driving documentation, such as driving licence, MOT and Insurance.

The fact is that it is a legal requirement that all motorists produce this documentation
whenever requested by a Police Officer in uniform. Failure to produce said documentation is an offence and you can be summonsed for it.

However, if you do not have this documentation about your person, the nice police officer can give you a Home Office Road Traffic slip 01 – or HORTI. This is also known as ‘a producer’. This slip is then taken to a police station along with the relevant documentation and checked by the nice police officer behind the desk and if all documentation is correct, you can be on your way.

If you don’t produce your documents within 7 days, you get a nice letter from the police inviting you to attend court ☺

Mr. Bill is looking forward to stopping all those silly people who don’t wear seatbelts, or continue to use phones whilst driving and also put a few nice tickets on the windscreens of the twits who park in dangerous places.



He is also hoping that by reading the latest intelligence logs at the station, he will be able to recognise the naughty people operating within his area – especially whilst they are driving to/from their crimes. Many of these people don’t have insurance or tax anyway, and so it will be even better to stop them for the crime and then do them for driving illegally as well – double whammy!